"Common" wealth

[Leesburg Chankenstank III]

Deep in a town, somewhere underneath a bridge
A vcu graduate is sleeping on a fridge

He yells to passers by that the end is near
And his mouth smells the same as his rear

I ask him, “Sir, what is the cause of your severe deterioration?
He responded angrily “How dare you assume my Gender Identification!”

I apologized profusely for assuming it’s gender
And then he proceeded to the Siegel Center

I suggested “before you go to the arena
Please consider deodorant or soap”, but he just got meaner

He replied profusely “we’re not like you snobs from the city of Fairfax”
We don’t judge people having dirty nut sacks

I will bleed black and gold until I’m geriatric
BTW, do you have any money? My Fridge needs a mattress.”

 

[Pikapppatri8]

Deep in a town, somewhere underneath a bridge
A vcu graduate is sleeping on a fridge

He yells to passers by that the end is near
And his mouth smells the same as his rear

I ask him, “Sir, what is the cause of your severe deterioration?
He responded angrily “How dare you assume my Gender Identification!”

I apologized profusely for assuming it’s gender
And then he proceeded to the Siegel Center

I suggested “before you go to the arena
Please consider deodorant or soap”, but he just got meaner

He replied profusely “we’re not like you snobs from the city of Fairfax”
We don’t judge people having dirty nut sacks

I will bleed black and gold until I’m geriatric
BTW, do you have any money? My Fridge needs a mattress.”

Please put this to music and record it.

Please?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[GMUSig03]

Deep in a town, somewhere underneath a bridge
A vcu graduate is sleeping on a fridge

He yells to passers by that the end is near
And his mouth smells the same as his rear

I ask him, “Sir, what is the cause of your severe deterioration?
He responded angrily “How dare you assume my Gender Identification!”

I apologized profusely for assuming it’s gender
And then he proceeded to the Siegel Center

I suggested “before you go to the arena
Please consider deodorant or soap”, but he just got meaner

He replied profusely “we’re not like you snobs from the city of Fairfax”
We don’t judge people having dirty nut sacks

I will bleed black and gold until I’m geriatric
BTW, do you have any money? My Fridge needs a mattress.”

That's what I'm talking about!!!!

 

[Mason2005]

So amazing!

Sent from my XT1575 using Tapatalk

 

[gmujim92]

Classic Chank. Maybe your best one yet. Bravissimo.

 

[mkaufman1]

Excellent work as always

 

[gmujim92]

I keep reading this in Frank Caliendo’s Morgan Freeman voice and it’s AWESOME.

 

[Leesburg Chankenstank III]

I keep reading this in Frank Caliendo’s Morgan Freeman voice and it’s AWESOME.

Wow you’re right. That takes it a whole new level! Lol! I need to work on my Morgan Freeman just for this.

 

[psyclone]

Nice effort, but I wouldn't recommend quitting your day job

arena...meaner; geriatric...mattress????? Going for mixing rhymes with blank verse perhaps?

 

[Leesburg Chankenstank III]

Nice effort, but I wouldn't recommend quitting your day job

arena...meaner; geriatric...mattress????? Going for mixing rhymes with blank verse perhaps?

Maybe if you say it in a Boston accent speaking fast?

 

[Pikapppatri8]

OK Chank has inspired me. So -- I offer this little piece in honor of his glorious name.

But before you read do a couple of things for me.



1.) Turn down the lights
2.) Pour a nice bourbon in a crystal glass
3.) Light a high end cigar or cigarette
4.) And relax............................................



Read to the sound of Frank Sinatra's "My Way"




And now - the game is near,

And so we face our foes the rams,

Fellow Pats, I’ll say it clear,

I’ll state it now - f**k the rams,



We’ve lived a life that’s full

The rams they live in degradation

No My Friends, We do Not

We went to Maaassooonnn!



Regrets, we’ve had a few

But then again to few to mention,

But, we walked the streets of vcu

Without viral protection,



As fans, we planned our lives,

Not like Rams who lacks civilization

And more, much more than this,

We went to Maaaasssooooonn!



Yes there were times, Im sure we knew,

That we shouldn’t have lost to vcu

But through, it all, when there was doubt

We ate it up and spit it out

We face it all and then stood tall

We went to Maaaassssoooooon!



We’ve loved, we laughed and cried,

We have our fill, our share of boozing,

And now as the sweats subside,

We find some sores that are oozing,



To think we did all that,

And may we say, not in a shy way,

f**k vcu

We went to Maaaaaaaassssoooon!



For what is a fan, what have we got?

If not ourselves then we have naught!

To say the things we truly feel

And not the words of Rams who kneel

The record will show - we kicked their a**,

We went to Maaaaasssooooon!

 

[Pikapppatri8]

GO MASON BITCHES!

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

 

[psyclone]

Maybe if you say it in a Boston accent speaking fast?

Ok...I get the Boston accent for "areneer"

 

[Leesburg Chankenstank III]

Deep in a town, somewhere underneath a bridge
A vcu graduate is sleeping on a fridge

He yells to passers by that the end is near
And his mouth smells the same as his rear

I ask him, “Sir, what is the cause of your severe deterioration?
He responded angrily “How dare you assume my Gender Identification!”

I apologized profusely for assuming it’s gender
And then he proceeded to the Siegel Center

I suggested “before you go to the arena
Please consider deodorant or soap”, but he just got meaner

He replied profusely “we’re not like you snobs from the city of Fairfax”
We don’t judge people having dirty nut sacks

I will bleed black and gold until I’m geriatric
BTW, do you have any money? My Fridge needs a mattress.”

By the way, this poem may have seemed like fiction but it was actually based on a real vcu graduate: